The Rhetoric of Abortion (iv)

The last couple of posts have actually been a digression. As so often, what I thought interesting and important was largely uncommented on by my intelligent and forebearing readers (and I always like to assume on these occasions that qui tacet consentire videtur - not that I have any grounds for so thinking, but it is so much more appealing to my vanity to do so...) and a passing comment generated the debate; and ever fond of digressions, I willingly allowed myself to digress...

But what I had originally intended to do, and the task to which I return now, is to examine some of the slogans used by those with whom I disagree.

Let us start with 'Every child a wanted child.'

It sounds so right, so self-evidently unarguable: but in fact I believe it to be flawed both in theory and practice.

In practice, we find a generation that has grown up believing this - or at least having it rammed down its throat - has been a generation arguably unparalleled in its poor treatment of children.

Parents deprive children of stable family life in the interests of self- fulfillment, liberation, or lust. Parents view children as fashion accessories, or lifestyle choices, and treat them accordingly: parade them when it is desirable to do so, and park them out of the way (in front of the TV, with the child minder, at the nursery...) when they are no longer needed to be shown. Parents shack up with other adults, not related to their children, exposing them to a high risk of abuse (for that is what the studies show, when they say most child abuse occurs in the home: most is at the hands of a parent's lover who is not the natural parent of the children - and a short reflection on the emotional dynamics of such dysfunctional households will reveal why that may be the case).

This practical reality flows from one of the theoretical flaws of the slogan. To proclaim that 'every child should be a wanted child' puts children and our relationship with them into the wrong category in our thinking. Children are not objects, to be wanted (or not), like handbags or iPads. Children are blessings, gifts, to be cherished and for which we should be grateful. We should not think that we are in a position to have an opinion (wanted or not wanted) about them. If we are married, that is a vocation to parenthood, in the natural way of things. If we have no such vocation, we should not behave, sexually, as though we have.

Another theoretical flaw is the conflation of the notion of a 'wanted' pregnancy with a wanted child. Many a pregnancy that was, at least initially, an unpleasant surprise (though again even that betrays a flawed way of thinking) has produced a child who is loved and valued. But the abortion industry thrives on hiding that truth.

So next time you hear that slogan, take the time to unpick it and expose the flawed thinking behind it - and in particular educate the young about this: for I think it will be our children's generation who will sort out this terrible business.